No, not related, silly, just
members of the same club – this is our special events minivan. Care to join us - It's bowling night!
What you have here are the proud
members of the Astigmatism Club - Eastern Region, North-Central sub
region! We are a splinter group of the National Astigmatism Organization (those bastards) but are recognized under the umbrella of the Worldwide Ocular Disorder Association.
Allow me to introduce everyone - starting
from the left we have Dwight. Astigmatism/Myopia he is a -2.00 +1.50 x 180, if
you want to believe his okcupid.com profile, that is! Dwight is the club
treasurer.
Next is Cynthia - +3.50 +3.00 x 45
with hyperopia. Cynthia is our social coordinator, and is a pretty good little
line dancer! None of us can keep up with her.
Then there is Francis, a hale and hearty
-4.75 -3.75x165 with bilateral amblyopia. He is in charge of membership. It’s thanks to
his recent membership push that we are up to 6 members! Way to go Francis! Don’t
worry, it's not you, he doesn’t really talk to strangers.
Next to him is Denise, nystagmus with a family
history of glaucoma, and is currently a -2.75 +2.00 x 90, although she has an
appointment tomorrow, so “fingers crossed”. Denise is our Secretary, and if you
want to see something amazing, come to one of our board meetings and watch her
take the minutes.
Then we have Nathan. -1.5 -1
90/-3.75 -1.5 180. Yes indeed, he is a very complex fellow. Nate is our Past-President,
our current Vice-President, and our resident computer geek! He really loves
working on complex computer programs, even CSIS (or was it CSE? RCMP? I can’t
remember) who questioned us, is interested in his work! Very impressive.
Then there is me – Susan, Current
President, Past Vice-President. At the moment, I’m -8.5 -2.75 18 with floaters. I met these crazy kids when they were
protesting outside the Lasik clinic near me. I was going in for a consultation,
and they stopped me, handed me some pamphlets and we got to talking. We think
of ourselves as kind of a subculture, with our own inside jokes, and language. Why
our glass cleaning ritual alone takes 30 minutes!
Oh! I almost forgot, our club “mascots”.
Those are our 3 dogs, Rover, Mittens, and Spotty.
What? Sure they are, silly!
